@thewanderer

[thewanderer]

http://youtu.be/MgePh_YJgrc
I had the exact same idea for this song. My all time favorite Em'.

[thewanderer]

 In the holiday spirit it is time for a re-telling of the craziest dream I've ever had. It happened in late November or early December 1998. I remembered this dream well and have told it many times. I couldn't make this up if I tried....

It happened like this....

I was sitting in a local dive resterant known as "The Lions". This was your typical gathering place for underage beatnicks, trenchcoat mafias, goths, and other assorted counter-culteral misfits. We preferred this vs. the ever fabled "Country Kitchen" because it was located downtown. So I was sitting there drinking my shitty coffee and smoking when this guy I know walks in. I'm going to call  him by his nickname which was "Butt", I don't know how he got the name, don't care, all I remember is he hated being called that. So he walks in and tells me he needs my help and wants me to come with him. I didn't have shit doin' so I went.

So we leave the resterant and get into his mom's shitty volvo station wagon. I ask him where we are going but he says it will be explained when we get there. He drives trough the country for what seems like an eternity. I try asking him where we were going but all he would say is we are almost there.

Finally I begin to see what appears to be a military base. He pulls in the driveway and someone at the gate checks his identification. At this point I'm asking him what the fuck is going on but he just tells me to relax. He parks the car and we are immediately escorted by military personel into a room where we are given black ops military fatigues. So we change and they lead us to another room where we are given M4's and remote explosives and given a brief training on how to operate them. All this time I am trying to figure out wtf is going on....

After our training we are lead into another room. This one is like a classroom and is filled with military personnel. Someone shows us where to sit and soon the general comes in........... "Gentlemen, Saddam Hussain is attempting to build the WORLD"S BIGGEST CHRISTMAS TREE, and you two are the only ones who can stop him. There is a shipment of giant christmas ornaments being sent from China and you need to destroy them. We have a C-130 ready for your departure. Good Luck."

So we get rushed out onto the plane and fly for what in dream time felt like a minute. Someone says we have reached our destination and hands us parachutes. The back of the plane drops out and we jump....

As we decend it becomes apparent we are in the persian gulf, the ship beneath us. It is nightime so we stealthly glide our way onto the ship unnoticed. The deck of the ship was filled with boxes of ornaments like you see at the store, except the ornaments were ten feet tall.  We start planting our explosives but as the last one is placed we get noticed and a firefight ensues. We shot everyone on the boat and planted our explosives so I said now what? Butt was already on the radio calling for our transit.

Just then this red Miami Vice boat pulls up and Butt says get in. We get on the boat and the captian was this kid I went to school with named James. James was huge into wwf wrestling and the first thing he said was "Did you see Hogan on Smackdown last night??" "No. No I didn't... just get us the fuck out of here."

Just then we start getting chased and shot at by some Arabs in Miami Vice speedboats. We tried to evade them, but couldn't. James said, "I'm gonna beach it, you guys run". So he drives the boat onto the beach and it flew through the air hitting pedestrians causing explosions and awesomeness. James stayed back to protect what was left of the boat, and Butt and I ran. We managed to hot-wire a Dodge Caravan which are common in Saudi Arabia. We were running low on ammunition so we decided to go to Fleet Farm which are also common in Saudi Arabia.

While we are gathering our ammo we noticed we are being watched buy these guys wearing a fez and figured it was trouble. We run out of Fleet Farm to our Dodge Caravan and drive off into the sunset.

The End.

[blixa]

do you have a dream journal? i can't remember any of my dreams.

[thewanderer]

I don't. I don't usually remember either unless it's something completely fucked up or I wake up in the middle of it.

[thewanderer]

And I will be extending an invitation to anyone who wants to meet me soon. Just give me some time.

The time has come.

This is a call to the four corners of the Earth.

Send requests to PitturaInfamante@hotmail.com and await further instruction.

[blixa]

where is everyone supposed to meet you?

[thewanderer]

where is everyone supposed to meet you?

1. Failure to follow instructions will result in immediate disqualification.
2. Asking questions will result in immediate disqualification.

It appears we have our first human sacrifice.
http://youtu.be/aG8WqEyXIyc

[thewanderer]

http://youtu.be/gTWo9oLJOWk
Collect the dots, la la la la, connect the dots, la la la la

[thewanderer]

Man I wasn't kidding.

So with my humblest apologies I am now using "The Fleek" to hereby resurrect Blixa. Sorry, I was out of line. I just get mad sometimes. Your friends suck.

where is everyone supposed to meet you?

"meet me at Kid Rock's next concert I'll be standin' by the Loch Ness Monster" -sorry that's an inside joke

I really should have seen this coming. Clairvoyance and premonition are a bitch to live with. It appears to me that I have been savagely trolled by my favorite band. Or maybe I'm just crazy, but to quote myself,

If someone says you are crazy, swallow your pride and consider it as a possibility.

So I guess that's it. All this time I've had this eerie feeling. It's been like this for over a year. Like I've been here and seen this before, not only here but in real life except it is always broken and out of focus.

I think we might have reached the end of the space-time-feed-back-loop. Don't know what I'm talking about? Neither do I. I'm just making this shit up. Nevermind.

I want to ask some questions for anyone who may be reading this and might have the proper wisdom to answer logically.

Have you ever experienced Deja vu? How often? Do you think it is a result of actual repetition, intuition, or precognition? And how often would you have to experience it in order for it to seem abnormal?

How about coincidences? Are they merely coincidental, or do you think that they could be supernatural? What if you noticed a coincidence, made a prediction based upon it, and your prediction was correct? Would that be coincidentally coincidental or supernaturally supernatural?

I don't just say this shit. There are no coincidences. Only fate. And the joke is on me. I took some time today to reflect and for some reason getting trolled brought it all into focus. The proverbial "her". She was only one thing that ever left me defeated, and she is narcissistic to the core. And it's the same thing that brought me to Deftones. They were the only thing that could sooth the burn. But that was a long time ago, and in the same way I don't dwell on her I'm not going to dwell on this. The jury is in and the verdict is retarded. So I'm turning on the screw. At least I can admit it. I have nothing to prove. I just want to have fun. I'm not sad about this, I actually think it's pretty funny. April fools came early this year, so I am going to use "The Fleek" to extend it the entire year.

So I'm just going to leave you with this, your moment of zen.
http://youtu.be/JKDo6g4CCeU

[Penicks]

so here's a reason why drugs are bad and you should stop never do them

get help

[thewanderer]

lol thats funny because I quit. But I have all the help I need. Not even the Deftones could bring me down. I don't really give a shit. It's life and par for the course. I'm surprised you haven't taken me up on my offer. I thought for sure you'd bite after the sacrifice.

[thewanderer]

Yeah?

[thewanderer]

New rules.

Rule #1 You must follow all of the rules.
Rule #2 Ignore rule #1.

[blixa]

i wonder which american is going to ask me for a de facto visa first once trump is president.

[thewanderer]

Hardy har har. I'm voting for satan. Just kidding, I quit voting.

[blixa]

they should make voting mandatory there.

[thewanderer]

they should make voting on all policy decisions mandatory there.

Fixed.

[bright lights, big city]

they should make voting mandatory there.

For real. I'm interested in Australia, though I've always loved/preferred Europe. But yeah, I'd rather have fucking Cthulhu elected.

[thewanderer]

Ugghh..... Do we really have to have the same conversations? This shit is boring.

And no need to vote Cthulhu. He already rules.

[blixa]

they should make voting on all policy decisions mandatory there.

Fixed.

wait till trump is your president and then you'll be singing a different tune. when we had tony abbott in at least we were like, "hey, we did it to ourselves because we all voted."