So my girl broke up with me on new years eve

[Martin]

Sorry to hear that man

wow, on new years eve? that's fucking harsh.

Agreed.

But remember that YOU are the shit and you don't deserve to be hurt like that. 

True as well.

Some people (chick in this case) can be so heartless and/or self indulgent.

[Jizzlobber]

I had sex on the night.

was fueled by Jager and Jose Quervo..

[StreetCarp1]

Sorry to hear that man. My suggestion is to leave her be. Don't call her, don't text her or anything. That usually works for me. After a day or so, they usually are like "why isn't he calling me, what is doing, did he get over me" all that good stuff. I bet you she calls you then. Just a thought.

[pissedandpierced]

I really am sorry to hear that. Personally I would write a letter to her and explain how upset you are, how much you cared about her and stuff, you don't have to send it but it may help writing it all down and if you do send it then it will show her how much she has hurt you. It's so easy to text and call these days and she may want some space as other people have mentioned. If you send her a letter then she has time to digest everything. If that doesn't help then get a train to Norwich and get high with me.

[StreetCarp1]

Also, take a couple xanax, it will make you forget about everything.

[ToneDef]

Yeah I may do the letter at some point. I tried not to contact her but I have given in a few times and txt her. When I'm at home on my own it gets too much and I just need to hear from her or something.

It was all just kinda weird. We were really cool, then one night she went out with some of her old friends, including some guy who's been txting her. The next day she txt me saying we're over. Her reasons are basically that we weren't going anywhere and that I didn't show I cared enough. That's true to an extent but this year was gonna be the year I fucking give her everything,. I was gonna ask her to marry me, try to get a place with her.. everything. It's just too late though.

The thought of her with this other guy just makes me so fucking sick. I miss her so much. I can't eat, I can't sleep. All I'm doing when I'm at home is smoking weed to send me to sleep. It just hurts too much being awake cuz all you can do is think about things. But then I'll have a dream when we're together, but then I'll wake up and it's just the worst feeling. The pain is just unbearable.

Thanks for the replies anyway.

[StreetCarp1]

Be strong man. She just cant get over you in a day, that not possible. I think shes on some tantrum where she wants to be by herself and with her friends and possible see whats out there. Send her some flowers or something, show her what she missing out on. If not, just dont even contact her for a few days and see what happens. I went through the same thing with my chick not to long ago, i used the not contacting her technique and it worked. She will be back buddy and I can assure you of that. Just be strong my friend, it will all work out.

[Variable]

how old is she?

and I think the the consensus around here is to not contact her.  As long as she thinks she still has you wrapped around her finger, and she can come back to you at any point, she will treat you like shit.  She needs to know that she could lose you forever.  Or maybe she has lost you forever.  Scare some sense into her, you know?

[defTHE1s]

sorry for hearing that.. i just wrote something here but since my time logged in ended, i couldn's post the message... maybe i'll write it again later, but not know... it's alla bout girls (my situation) and an advise to you... let her just think... no contact... if she contacts you maybe that means something... if not... well maybe that's definetely the end... hope not but...
hope you know her very well to know (or think) what is she thinking right now...
that's sad, especially on new years eve...   

[ToneDef]

I know the whole no contact thing would maybe work, but I know her and don't think it would. Anyway, I wrote a letter. I spent like 4 hours on that fucker, smoked a cig, decided, drove to her house and put it through her door. If she's not gonna speak to me then at least I told her how I feel. That's all I can do now.. Just wait it out.

Thanks guys, really. I been on here nearly 6 years, I just wanted some input from the people on here. Posting my shit on here doesn't seem weird. It helps. Thank you.

[pissedandpierced]

I'm so glad that you are starting to move on in a way. You know that everyone on here loves you, you have the best Deftones tattoo ever and your totally cool. I know what will make you laugh though, I have this crush on this guy I see at gigs and I have just realised that I have been messaging his brother about Chimaira.

[White Pwny]

You did the right thing Travis. 

I feel bad for both in this situation... if she thinks she wasn't getting enough of your time.. and you guys have been together for a while, of course she will seek what she needs out, even if it isn't with you.    I hope you told her in the letter that this was to be the year to change things.   Perhaps if she reads how you REALLY feel, and sees that you are looking for something long term, and that you WANT to spend time with her, things can really turn around.   

Mozzy went thru a breakup quite a while ago, and he and I talked alot.   After a few months, they got back together and are now living together.  Things will work out exactly how they are supposed to Travis.  Keep your chin up.   =o)

[tarkil]

I'm really sorry to hear that my friend...
I'm not really good for this kind of advices, but I can tell you what worked for me : just see your mates all the time, try to be busy as much as you can seeing people, doing stuff, etc. All the time you are doing something is the time you will not think too much about her, and will not feel too down...

Whatever happens in the next few days, stay strong and as everyone said it already, don't contact her too much, she needs to see that you are not an easy thing that she can play with.

Keep your head up my friend, and as hard as it is now, and whatever happens, remember time heals everything anyway...
Good luck brother.

[ToneDef]

She eventually got hold of me today while I was at work. We had a long txt conversation and it's over. She wants pretty much nothing to do with me. I fucked up so bad by not making enough effort when it mattered. I've lost her for good and it hurts so so much. I just saw some new pics of her on her Facebook and she looks so happy and so fucking gorgeous. And she's not mine anymore. I want to talk to her so much but it'll just drive her away further. This just hurts so much.

[Martin]

Man, I am really sorry to hear this man. It's so wrong it make my stomach turn, in the way that, there are countless other ways to show dissatisfaction with your relationship, to show you want more attention, then ending it straight away. Maybe there are other motives at work?
If you have shared friends, you might want to hit them up, as to what the fuck she think she's doing. After that, or if not, go with what Tarkil said. Go do stuff with friends. Talk about it if it's to much, try to think of other things when it's not, take time and gain perspective. Go on holiday. Change of scenery. You're welcome to crash my couch if you want to hang out in Holland for awhile.
Anyway, take care dude

[Uno]

oh man im in the same situation. the best thing to do is to not have any contact with the other person.  I actually moved from Cali to Oregon Last 2 weeks ago, and she has been texting me non stop and checking my facebook/myspace to see who im talking to or to see how i am. Just relax bro. whats happening to you happend to me.  Ive been with this girl for about 6 years and it hurts too much to let go. keep your head up

[fireflyry]

Bro...that blows.

In saying, if she cared she wouldn't do that at such a time.

IMO that's intentional hurt.

To the point where maybe she hopes you get angry, or hurt enough, that it excuses her actions.Even if she doesn't want to be with you there is a difference between an acceptable time and place to say so ,with respect of what you had, and a way to do it to spite.

Be wary and careful my friend.

I sense nasty motives to such things.

In saying I have a solution bro:

[ToneDef]

Thanks guys. Tuck, I may take you up on that offer sometime. Uno, I'm sorry you're going through similar shit. I wouldn't wish it on anyone. As you were with her for 6 years you must have a ton more happy little memories that are haunting you. Sorry man.

The latest update is basically what happened last night. Her best friend, this girl, txt me to ask if I had any of her DVD's. I  didn't but I had a present for her kid that was originally gonna be from me and Holly for his 3rd birthday. Well, I guess I was holding onto it so Holly could get it herself, like an excuse to see her. But that was just stupid so I told her friend I'd run it up as she lives kinda near me. Well I drove it up and she asked if I wanted to come in. I wasn't going to but fuck it, why not, right? We ended up just having a chat 'cause I always got on with her anyway and I ended up finding out a couple things that made me feel a bit better.

The night out they both had a couple nights ago, where Holly looks so fucking beautiful in the pics on Facebook, wasn't much of a night out at all. They were only out a few hours before Holly wanted to go home because she was feeling really upset. I know it's a small thing but before then I kinda just assumed she wasn't feeling what I was. Like she just cut me off without feeling anything. I found out she's been crying a lot and stuff. It was just kinda reassuring that she's hurting too.

Well her friend said to just give it a little while and to give her time to think about things and stuff. That's all I can do. I'll let anyone know of anything major that happens but if it doesn't then thanks guys for all the comments. I feel like a pussy but fuck it, it hurts man.

[Jacob]

sorry to hear all this dude. heartache is a fucking bitch. all I'm gonna add is give her space - nothing good comes from pushing. I'm an expert at not letting go and it's turned deep shit into much deeper shit every time. you can't force someone into feeling what you want them to feel, unfortunately.

[goldpony]

keep on truckin brother. take it as a lesson learned, now you know what to do next time. always take the time to tell the ones you love how much you care. like how you said you had planned to ramp it up this year, you obviously knew you had been lacking on that front. stop bein a meathead and express yourself and put in quality time